Being rude

Deliberately Rude.

From those times of the beautiful people when good manners were deliberately studied and cultivated and the populace tried to ape them as far as they could, just to be called gentlemen, we have now reached the other end of the spectrum, where being deliberately rude seems to be “IN”. It is not an isolated phenomenon. You can go to any corner of the world and you are confronted with humans who refuse to recognize your presence and if they do, they do it with obvious displeasure with grunts or expletives that would have been considered vulgar or abusive some 30 years ago.

The question is why. Are they doing it deliberately? Are they just awfully lacking in education? Are they making a statement of sorts?

If they are doing it deliberately then where did they see the need of it in the first place? If they are lacking in education, once they are out in the world, they could easily learn from example of others around them but they don’t. If they are doing it to make a statement, then of course the question is what is it?

It makes me go back to the generation divide question. Every generation announces itself by doing something shocking to make the elder generation take note of their presence and separate identity. I suppose something of the same order is taking place here. The world now belongs to machines and their operators. The middle class with its basic values and education has been edged out. What can we expect?

A deeper study of some instances will make it very obvious.
1) The Girl at the counter of a store today; her job is specific. She has to take the products that you have decided to buy and placed in your basket, pass them over the electronic bar reader and take the money from you. She has no need to know anything about the product or its price of anything at all. The display counter shows the total. Your job is to hand over the cash. All the education the girl needs to be able to count the cash. Every aspect of the thinking and calculating part is done by the machine. Does she need to talk? Not if she does not want to. Just because you have bought an expensive perfume from her store, does not mean she has to be polite to you!

2) The taxi driver; you wave him down. If he stops (Note the “IF”) you get in the car. You give him the address and shut up. When you reach there, if you have the rudimentary education to read the meter, you look at the display and pay with a tip for the favor done to you and quickly get out. Displays of camaraderie and even polite greetings are not in order.

3) I go for lunch in a pretty expensive restaurant which happens to be in a busy part of the town. I finish lunch and wish to linger over a coffee. But the waiter has other ideas. He takes away the plates, removes the tablecloth and brings out a new one, snaps it pat into my face and starts laying down the table again for the next customer. The message was clear.

Things are getting worse. At the petrol pump the trend is toward self service. At the store the passing of money is now limited to swiping cards and if technology has its say, this too will be eventually done from a distance. Deliveries are being made at home. The trend is toward minimum human interaction. Any attempt towards conversation, even the commenting on the weather becomes an infringement of the right to remain aloof. Their privacy and freedom is paramount which includes the right to be stupid and a disturber of the peace. You are allowed only to hear their voice when they are incessantly talking on their cell-phones and forcing you to listen to their inane chatter.

The other day two people were standing quite in the middle of the road with their scooter in between them and have a serious and important talk. From what I could see, they were deliberately showing off their presence. After years on the road, even these morons would know that other vehicles could be passing by and would be dangerous to their health; stopping a bit on the side where there was ample space could not have exerted them overmuch and it would leave the road to the traffic. But no; even with cars whizzing by they were making a great show of being too importantly engrossed. Poor car-owners, they would have to wait their pleasure or squeeze through the little space remaining.

As the story goes I blew on the horn and kept on coming, totally ignoring the scooterists. When they saw that I was not seeing them and might even brush into them, they ran helter-skelter to save themselves and they were mightily shocked. This happened near my house, so they saw me stopping and came over to argue the point. The conversation ran something like this: Scooterists: You don’t care about others. We could have been hurt. Me: So? If you are worried about yourself, why stand in the middle of the road? Scooterists: Even then, will you run people over? Me: Yes. Scooterists: What? You will knowingly run people down (shock in their voices)? Me: Yes. If you are not worried about saving yourselves why should I try to save you?..... This left them gaping and one of them even had the grace to smile. They made faces and buzzed off. I would not advise anyone to take this stance today. It may not be good for your general well being in the present-day wild dispositions.

If the rudeness is more than you can take, stay at home. Use your mobile to order things and limit your outings to five star locations, where for your money they will be polite and even extra-polite and may even tolerate some reasonable amount of your ire.